Newgrounds: A place to get your mom pregnant and argue about censorship.

Please enjoy your stay.

At 6/10/14 12:06 AM, Eddmario wrote: ^The EA conference was 90% EA sports games, Battlefield: Hardline, and milking of series that should have ended a few years ago.

90% is an understatement. Let's not forget about the "new" ip of Bioware's that biodrones are going to eat up like morons.

gang raped

Good. Fuckin rapists deserve death sentences I swear to God. I mean fuck, his own step son?

bet the guy had a real purdy mouth.

First, don't ask fuckers like the NG community.

Also if it's actually threatening his health, have an intervention or something. Something drastic that'll get him to wake up. Some kind of outer help. Good luck with that man.

Have you guess what number your family members have been thinking about? Can you read my thoughts? Am I truly gay?

Marriage is a gamble. There is a chance that shit'll fall apart, that's true but there is also the chance that that person WON'T end up being shitty. There is a chance that there won't be that one fuck up and there is a chance that you'll be with him/her/it/that/woof forever.

I consider Newgrounds my first divorce.

A true masterpiece. I'd love for this to be a movie or at least a flash animation staring Jonah Falcon or Tom Fulp respectively.

At 5/13/14 01:27 AM, ChillyMcHotpants wrote: I sat mildly at the bus stop, exhausted from a day of dealing with angry morons over the phone. The job paid well but didn't seem worth it for the massive stress it inflicted on me.
I keep to myself and observe the people around me. there's an older lady with enormous breasts showing her cleavage as if it could compensate for the hideous face no doubt carved out from a life time of meth and alcohol and who knows what else. her black dress barely covered her robust figure. we had fifty minutes until the next bus arrived. I probably could have walked in that time period over to the street that would have the route take me home. Walking out in the ninety degree weather with the sun beating down on my delicate pale skin did not become an option.
I...
-----------------------------

...began to twiddle my thumbs as I pondered how got myself in this situation. I had a job and a girlfriend and a family that loved me, but I couldn't remember any of them. What a single fall can do to a person is strange. The woman coughed violently and wheezed behind us. The older black gentleman groaned quietly in disgust. I continued to ponder until I realized that the wheezing and coughing slowly began to get worse and loud. Slowly, everyone began to turn to her. I noticed I had been the last one. A puddle of blood was forming as she clung to the wall behind the bus stop. The older black gentleman said to her...

For the sake of nostalgia.

I once posted on the Newgrounds Bulletin Board System in mid-2012.

Funnily enough, everyone we complain about leaving this place behind comes back to tell a guy that we all left. I have half a mind to brace for posts from Crawford and Sheizenhammer, hell maybe even that guy who ruined us a while back. lolowait, here I am.

I can't help but feel responsible for the downfall of this place. I'm certain only one of you knows what I'm even talking about (Tails), but even so. If I hadn't vouched for him, maybe? If Crawford or whoever hadn't been such an asshole to, what was it? KingLightning? Oh how Crawford intimidated me at the time. When I was but a young blamer with only a police badge and a terrible need to feel wanted somewhere and make a difference. If that fucking chat hadn't happened, maybe we'd have lasted longer. But after the mods got involved, Tails lost all hope. Maybe he lost it before, but for a while I've taken the blame internally and all I got was a week long suspension when I deserved dishonorable discharge in my 12 year old mind. Maybe that's why we shouldn't have ever tried a flash or a chat. It was too much. Now we've got mods for the portal.

Let's be honest though, Newgrounds is dying without us. The quality is, to be honest, the same as it always has been but with a new generation of hipsters and children and scum of the internet, it's "changed" to me. Maybe I'm just nostalgic, but holy fuck this place is begging for money.

Heed my warning or ignore me youngins, I'm just an old coot by today's standards. For all you know it's a drunken rant.

A drunken rant filled with regret.

God. First time I come to NG in a long while, and this is what greets me. R.I.P. in peace, Lord-Humungus.

I think we seem pretty damn obsolete, now that NG has portal mods. If we could actually whistle anything, we'd have an actual reason to post. The only other option in mind is that we could use the thread to find abusive reviehahaHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAAH oh god I couldn't even say that with a straight face. All I see this thread really being good for is post abusive flashes to vote down on and a weekly roster, which in reality is a B/P club with no one posting a roster ever because when does that ever happen.

The NGPD, just like NG, is totally dead and there is no saving it. The glass is totally empty and dry as a bone. Never again shall we wet our whistles. Insert clever pun about whistles here. And a sexual innuendo.

Because blowing.
Also holy sudden massive wave of old users posting. inb4 Sheizenhammer.

At 10/6/12 12:10 AM, Pride wrote: Powerprower, Lizzardis, and ILBC should also be on the list. They were pretty chill.

I heard my name and came running.

Also let's all have a moment of silence for Ross, considering he was a true Newgrounds hero.

At 7/27/12 09:49 PM, Lizzardis wrote: stuff

I think we've all felt this but where to afraid to say it. The NGPD is ACTUALLY DEAD now along with the rest of Newgrounds all together to be honest. I certainly can't help but to blame myself as it was my shitty idea of a chat and allowing certain people who weren't members in it. With the horrifying death of said chat that caused the mods b&hammers to come millimeters of our noses we all got disheartened making us lose interest and it led to our inevitable downfall.

Which is why we can't let it die. We need to come back from this stronger than ever this time. Our job was to blam and protect and as God as my witness I won't stop until we've wiped every piece of shit from this great website forever together like we said we would. We need to be ruthless about this and we need to FORCE ourselves to do so. I've done it before and as you can see I didn't push hard enough.

I'll admit before I began typing all of this, I was about to agree and let us die. But then I went to the portal and saw what is in the picture below. The sudden fast rage that filled me helped me remember that it is our job to eradicate it. So we will. We will get back on our feet. I refuse to let us die this time. Maybe we'll die some day but that day is not today. We'll finish the flash and we'll get back on our feet stronger than ever this time. And this will only happen if we work to make it happen.

And hai, Lizzy.

At 7/25/12 10:31 PM, Narcissy wrote: Here's a suggestion. Rather than just trying to butt heads with the buttheads here to formulate a decision, why not act out and send messages asking the ones who had friends here, did work, and who scramble around these parts trying to get the group going

Chances are the inactive ones probably don't even realize how inactive they're helping making the group.

This. I really don't think we should do something as drastic as getting a new commissioner just because we aren't as active as we used to be.

At 7/17/12 06:34 AM, Decky wrote:

At 7/16/12 06:49 PM, ilikeblamingcrap wrote: Now lets get this flash done once and for all <3

Good to hear that you are Okay and I'll give you that you're determined to get this flash done. I have to ask who is doing what? Who's the animator? Voice Actors? What genre is it going to be?

Animator is our favorite soup can
Voice actors are me for myself, Tails for Tails (I think), and Narcissy said he couldn't voice himself and we still need a voice for P-Bot. You can do either and I could prolly do the other one unless anyone else is up to it.

Read the script for more info pl0x

CLEAR!

*buzz, ZAP!*

O hai NGPD! First I'd like to apologize for not being around as lately some very... personal family issues had come up (like I promised they WOULDN'T) but that shit is FINALLY resolved and I plan on being here much more often. I've been in a dark place the past few months, but I vow to get back into my old routine and get shit done, not just on NG, but other places as well. I've been lazy and as ashamed as I am to say it, depressed with what was going on (#whitepeopleproblems) but I'm over that and I'm here to stay (again). I hope everyone is ready!

Now lets get this flash done once and for all <3

At 6/27/12 05:29 AM, Decky wrote:

At 6/27/12 01:16 AM, TailsPrower wrote: but yeah...

To tell the truth, I'm only offering to help because i think that i'd be something that deserves to get made but as far as what I'm going to do for it it'll stop at voice actor. I sure as hell am not animating it.

We already have an animator and we already have a script (which I re-posted here). Let's all review it and lets all agree on it and most importantly, lets get it animated. Once we agree on the script, we'll agree on the cast of voice actors, record, animate and release.

Also post your auditions in the scripts thread as well kthxbai.

At 6/24/12 07:18 AM, Decky wrote:

At 6/24/12 03:54 AM, TailsPrower wrote:

Who said we were ditching your script? I'm just coming up with my own which actually takes a little after what you had going. When I'm done, I just want some feedback is all. We're hardly calling anything final at this point lol.

I'm just saying, I've been talking about it for a while and no one has really said anything about it.

Why don't you two just co-write a script together

I've been suggesting this FOREVER.

Why don't you people listen to me ;_;

At 6/17/12 08:17 PM, TailsPrower wrote: I'm working on a script atm. It's incomplete but I like the direction it's going. It could use some more comic relief though, as it seems rather stale and colorless as it is right now. But I'll post it when it's ready.

But but but no one ever told ME that we where ditching my script! I've been waiting for Tails to do the line in my script for quite a while and since no one ever volunteered in the old thread, it kinda took a dump. I could repost the old script so we could FINALLY fuckin' agree on the damn thing.

Also hai gaiz.

At 6/1/12 10:37 AM, Pride wrote: I have a feeling all of this author's submissions are stolen, as all of his flashes have different authors. Hopefully this one won't get passed judgment.....

Whoa guys, leave some stolen flashes for us. Reminds me of when Pride was still mike and him and Power raped the portal of all it's abusive flash. Damn good find(s) boys and nice job.

oh god, now I'm turning into Tails.

At 5/26/12 04:03 AM, Decky wrote: And please can I do something for it that isn't voice acting.

I already said yes.

At 5/24/12 04:20 PM, Spretznaz wrote:

At 5/24/12 12:40 PM, ilikeblamingcrap wrote: [You're] damn right it's interesting! We could defiantly use moar voices as this is not going to be the only flash. I'm still going to be working on my original idea of reenacting the entire NGPD threads (yes, THREADS. As in this one AND the original) so the more the merrier.

So this is going to be a series or something? I was under the impression it was going to be only one flash.

No, THIS is not going to be a series, but I do have a second script on the (now old) forums. Once we finish this one I'll be working hard on that one.

And what is this about a new site for us? I'm not exactly sure I'm ready for change, but it looks good.

At 5/23/12 03:40 PM, Spretznaz wrote: A flash about the NGPD, huh? This actually sounds pretty damn interesting. I'm an alright voice actor (not amazing) but I do know Actionscript fairly well.

Your damn right it's interesting! We could defiantly use moar voices as this is not going to be the only flash. I'm still going to be working on my original idea of reenacting the entire NGPD threads (yes, THREADS. As in this one AND the original) so the more the merrier.

Also, a couple links to a script have been posted, but I'm getting a 403 error when I click on them.

Have you tried signing into the private forums?

At 5/22/12 03:31 PM, 34Deadman wrote: Looking at the posting on the PF about the flash there's something missing. A FUCKING SCRIPT THAT WE ALL AGREE ON. It seems Tails has taken duty of writing(expect this to come out in a year or two).

What? This also proves that no one ever read my previous posts when I began to write this saying "PLEASE READ THE SCRIPT SO THAT WE AGREED ON IT" and I've been saying that FOR ABOUT A YEAR. And if there is something you don't agree with or have something to add, remember to post in the PF's.

Anywho, I do hope this can take off even if the past says this will fail miserably. Just wondering though, ILBC why did you mainly include yourself and Tails in the first idea of the script?

Tails was the "main character" in the NGPD's original idea of the flash. I like being a camera man and NO ONE ELSE was posting in the NGPD at the time so I just went with it.

At 5/20/12 02:04 PM, Decky wrote: things

There is a thread on the PF's. Read it. Use it. Memorize it. Record any auditions using vocaroo and post them in the thread. Any and all auditions and suggestions or ideas go in the thread. Post stuff that belongs in the thread somewhere else? That's a paddlin'.

Lets get this shit done people.

At 5/18/12 02:52 PM, Sheizenhammer wrote: I'd mention the flash about the NGPD too, but that's an even more dead idea than the PM thing.

It's not dead, I just need Tails to send me his lines. I also need someone to send me P-bots lines and we've got a flash made. However, a certain group of police officers here are to lazy to to to the private forums and search for the script.

(Ohai NGPD.)

Go away. <3

I HEREBY RISE FROM THE DEAD AS A COLD, HEARTLESS, MURDER MACHINE. TOBUSCUS STYLE.

Now that things at my house have (fucking finally) stopped getting worse every day, I realize that I need to get off my lazy ass and start doing shit on NG moar often. And by shit I mean that god damn NGPD flash that none of us have been working on. We still need a voice actor for P-Bot, and I'd really rather not use strawberry clocks voice like Tails suggested. We need idea's people and we need everyone to work on the script. Lets finally get this damned thing done once and for all!